Pee-wee Herman was a source of inspiration, delight, and comfort for so many of my generation and beyond. Having missed the 1981 Pee-Wee Herman Show, my introduction to Pee-wee came with Pee-wee’s Big Adventure in 1985, and I was happy to follow him to his playhouse a year later. By then, Pee-wee Herman was a ubiquitous pop culture icon. And yes, I was one of those insufferable children capable of delivering an annoyingly spot-on Pee-wee impersonation and happy to do so at any given moment.
Pee-wee entered the zeitgeist just as kids my age were expected to start letting go of childish things in preparation for the wild discomforts of adolescence. Cue this nerdy man-child—steadfast in his wonder, playfulness, and subversive edge. He spoke to kids like me who had no interest in letting go of their childhood joys.
When Toy de Jour invited me to take part in Paging Mr. Herman…, a Pee-wee Herman group art show I was honored, excited, and replied with an enthusiastic “yes!”
That enthusiasm quickly gave way to a sense of overwhelm as I entered the idea and planning stage. Of all things Pee-wee, what would I land on as an artistic representation of this person who had filled my heart and imagination for so long? I felt simultaneously flooded with ideas and at a loss for any that felt worthy of such a tribute.
As I often do, I bounced the idea off my best friend, Sasha. She is good at distilling some of my disorganized ideas into something less chaotic. She spoke five words that unlocked an idea in me.
“It has to be Paul.”
This shorthand for “focus on the man behind Pee-wee” was just what I needed.
Having just seen the Matt Wolf documentary, Pee-Wee as Himself, I was deeply moved and grateful for the final gift of insight into Paul Reubens’ true self, personal history, and creative process—not to mention the clarification around the legal troubles that had plagued him. It became clear to me that I needed to present Paul as he was in the documentary.
I thought of the talking Pee-wee Herman doll made by Matchbox in 1987 and wondered what a talking Paul Reubens doll might look like. The concept imagined an alternate reality in which Paul Reubens was just as popular and revered as the character he created, and there was a talking doll to prove it. Much like Paul’s mission to convince the world that Pee-wee Herman was a real person, I wanted to remind people that Paul was a real person too, and worthy of the spotlight that Pee-wee enjoyed.
In conceptualizing the “ifs” and “hows,” I almost instantly discarded the idea, thinking it would be too difficult. Thankfully, my stubbornness wouldn’t let it go.
So, I sourced a broken talking Pee-wee doll, a voice box device, and got to work—aging Pee-wee into Paul Reubens, dressing him as he appeared in the documentary, and giving him back his real voice.
This was one of my more laborious projects, involving sculpting, sewing, fabric dying, painting, and audio editing, some of which are disciplines outside of my comfort zone. The months-long effort was riddled with missteps, errors, and redos, but my tenacity held and I am thrilled with the final result—a one of a kind talking Paul Reubens doll. Maybe too thrilled, seeing how when it came time to send the piece to Toy de Jour, I felt a sense of mourning as I packaged him up. Like when Paul Reubens died, or as the end credits of Pee-wee as Himself rolled, I found myself sad that he was gone and wishing for more of the magic he brought into the world.
So, I present to you: the Paul Reubens as Himself talking doll. Squeeze his torso to hear him speak. I poured a lifetime of inspiration, laughter, subversion, and love into him. I hope it shows.
Paul Reubens as Himself will be featured alongside an impressive curation of Pee-wee-centric art by a talented group of artists at Paging Mr. Herman…, opening September 12, 2025, at Toy de Jour.
Hear some of what paul has to say.
Talk Junk