It is entirely possible that I fantasize about time machines too often. I imagine travelling back to moments in my childhood, not to make adjustments, but to revisit, understand, and observe. That is not to say that I am anti-now. I understand that being mindful of the present is important, but I feel that trying to hang on to it is like trying get a good grip on a greased snake. It’s going to get away from you. I’m just fond of the idea of stepping back to savor moments that have gotten away, and being able to do so with more clarity than photographs, video and the inevitable degradation of memory can provide.
I was an only child, born just in time for the dawn of the Hollywood blockbuster era, the George Lucas merchandising force, and the Bronze Age of comic books. I was a disciple of the Saturday morning hypnotists and consumed the wares that they peddled, be they plastic, sugary, fizzy, or fried. I watched as cable boxes replaced rabbit ears atop television sets and recall the day video games blipped, bleeped, and blooped from the arcade into the living room. My devotion to this “kid stuff” long outlasted my childhood, and isolated me from my peers at times.
I remain a pop culture zealot who enjoys respite in an insatiable and indiscriminate ingestion of all media be it of the page or screen. I’m a socially awkward, anxiety-filled introvert who can pass as fairly normal most of the time, but not without an internal struggle. I’m a reluctant adult clinging to some of my childhood treasures and reacquainting myself with some of the ones that I’ve lost. I’m a chronic nostalgist, a creative escapist, and a lunatic completist. With mild orthopedic challenges and a clinical diagnosis of obsessive-compulsive disorder, I’ve sequestered myself to a life of playing indoors. These days however, I’m attempting to imagine my maladies as the quirky strengths of a mad scientist capable of dreaming up a time machine. Junk Fed is my time machine, helping me parse memories of the past, indulge in nostalgia, and reconcile how it has shaped the person that I am today.